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imagery_comm

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[09 Mar 2009|09:08pm]

kova
do they have antidepressants in heaven?
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[15 Aug 2008|10:43pm]

kova
happiness is being distracted enough from reality to be able to ignore it.
let's go back to bed
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[15 Jun 2008|02:05pm]

kova
reloading high-powered firearms is terrific fun
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[25 Mar 2008|08:58pm]

kova
I need you to like me because I don't
so like me for me
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[05 Dec 2007|10:17pm]

kova
bullet proof dress
aural suicide note
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[25 Nov 2007|11:09am]

kova
kill me now in secret so the police don't get you but don't tell anyone or I'll hate you
we aren't what we thought we were after all
I don't think anyone understands how we feel about us

reborn for good
in a place where brain chemicals don't exist
and no scientist can tell us why we feel
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[21 Nov 2007|12:09pm]

kova
why should I withdraw before the class is over. who the fuck thought that up. i want to see the class through to the end. if i don't, no big deal, it doesn't hurt my GPA. let's all fuck with the system and give up before it's over. fuck you. fuck all of you. i want to see if i can pass this course and it's too late. i'm going to fail at least one course. i'm going to drop below 2.0. i hate this. i hate everything. i hate myself. i'm not part of any of you. i don't want to be a part of any of you. i don't want to be involved in this. fuck you fakes. fuck all of you who abuse everyone. all of you don't give a fuck about integrity. you just joke about it and think of something else. fuck you. i want to slice all of you open. i want to shatter everything. and i can't because i don't have the means or authority. i don't have control over any of you. i can't do anything to any of you. i can just sit there and smile. go fuck yourselves. you're sickening. none of you care about anything. none of you care about anything. you don't even get how selfish you are. you'll never get it. because you don't have to. no one's forcing you to. so you'll never know. you just adapt to the system. god do i want to detonate. and i'll never get the chance to.
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[21 Nov 2007|12:01pm]

kova
EVERYTHING WE THINK AND DO IS DETERMINED BY OUR EMOTIONS
WE ARE WHAT WE FEEL
WE REFLECT WHATEVER INFLUENCES US TO EXPRESS OUR EMOTIONS
NO ONE IS UNIQUE
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[31 Oct 2007|07:42pm]

kova
everything fucks with me
fuck around for a lifetime until something happens
then drive a car into my side and send me flying into something hard and my insides being crushed do not make a sound loud enough for anyone to hear
anyone can watch
anyone can project their stereotypes onto my corpse
anyone can go home and that's it
there was no flash of light
there was no tunnel
there was just my head reaching its limit
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[25 Oct 2007|07:27pm]

kova
quiet slit your wrists suicide
chaotic gunshot to the brain suicide
slow bleed to death
fast get knocked out for good
suicides no one knows about
driving into a car in the opposite direction and both of you die internally on the way to the hospital
jumping off a tall building or bridge
stand-off with the police
point something that looks like a weapon at them
suicide by cop

all kinds of suicide
all the good ones are taken
no one knows how to be creative anymore
who can think at a time like this
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[24 Oct 2007|08:50pm]

kova
the sounds of traffic

fuck me
rip off my head
press me against a wall

I can wake up next to you
Give me medicine
Pour it into my

Cut me open
Shut up

chemicals are inside my head
the chemicals control me
tell me what to do
I follow the serotonin
I follow the adrenaline
they make me a big hopeless mess
scattered all over the place
I don't even think about it

I am mechanical
I will follow the chemicals
then I will detonate

Brain chemicals control me
Tell me who to love
I follow the serotonin
I follow the adrenaline
They make me a big hopeless mess
Scattered all over the place

I am mechanical
I will follow the chemicals
Then I will detonate

don't ask questions
no one asks questions
self-justified

suicide practice
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[31 Aug 2007|10:01pm]

kova
kitty suicide
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[31 Aug 2007|10:01pm]

kova
I watch dead kids on the news
and I'm inspired
I almost get into a car accident
and I'm inspired
I hear other people sing in my headphones
and I'm inspired
I go out with a pretty girl
and I'm inspired
I watch other pretty girls on TV
and I'm inspired
Numb my body and I'll numb your head
and I'll be inspired

I apply what I know to the world
I see events unfold around me
I am merciless to my senses
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[01 Aug 2007|06:47pm]

kova
label me. generalize me. make yourself happy. make yourself comfortable through me. say it's for me. tell me it's for me. to make you comfortable. stay away. get away from me. i don't want any of you. i'm not part of any of you. i will not be generalized. you change me. there's nothing i can do. i am influenced. we are influenced. we are hollow. influence me. they are influencing me. they are changing me. stop them. someone has to stop them. nothing can stop them. they are moving too fast. everything is moving too fast. slam me into the ground and keep me subdued. keep me against the floor. press it into my brain. inject chemicals into my brain. play with the chemicals in my brain. play with the chemicals in my brain. it is there inside me. i cannot find it. they distract me. they distract me. they curb my thoughts. they manipulate my thoughts. i can't stop it. i can't stop it. am i blessed? i can't stop it. they are killing me like they have killed everyone else. cope. cope with everything. spend your life coping. every day we learn to cope. i will not cope like you. i will not give in. do not change me. i will try to stop you. i will try to stop you. you are in my way. get off of me. i will force you off. i will force you off and slam you against the wall and inject chemicals into your brain. how does it feel? feels good, doesn't it? what have you been told? what have they told you? what have you listened to? who have you followed? what is the sum of your influences? go ahead, numb me, change the chemicals, play with me, generalize me. you won't win. i won't give in to you. you'll have to kill me because i'm not stopping. you made me into this and now you will have to stop me or i'll tear everything you've made apart. empty. right now. change my thoughts. feel my coping. get off.
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[19 Jul 2007|07:28pm]

kova
focus merciless
shout and yell because no one's there
we focus mercilessly
i suppose now's a good time to tell you again that i love you
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[06 Dec 2006|05:27pm]

kova
coping = creativity
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[24 Nov 2006|02:52pm]

kova
inspiration mechanism
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[10 Nov 2006|05:04pm]

kova
save yourselves
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[05 Nov 2006|10:04pm]

kova
charged
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[05 Nov 2006|09:40pm]

kova
chain suicide
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